My Musings

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Musing 9 – It is impossible to Change your Mind

Your mind is like a computer, continually being programmed and re-programmed. It has almost an infinite capacity to store new data, new behaviours, new pictures, new emotions. It is truly an incredible vessel. And we should be in awe of what each of us is capable of through the wise use of this sponge, this hard-drive, this infinite source of connection. But, and there is always a but, once something is programmed into the mind, … Continue reading

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Lesson 7 – Healing can only happen at source

One of the saddest and most frustrating (for the client and myself) experiences I come across in coaching and life generally is peoples continual desire to attract and collect friends and acquaintances in an attempt to feel valued and valuable. It is my experience that we choose this “strategy” as a catharsis for past experiences. More specifically we do it to disprove the self-imposed damage created from the disconnection/ betrayal/rejection/scorn/isolation etc created through experiences with … Continue reading

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Lesson 5 – Your motivation needs to be positive AND negative

The world is awash with the concept of motivation, and particularly positive motivation. And it is a powerful concept, one that has earned many, many millions of dollars – through book sales, courses, therapy, coaching and other forms. But it doesn’t really work (not for long and not sustainably), and never will – at least not in isolation. It is time we embraced the duality, the yin and yang of motivation. To truly affect change … Continue reading

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Lesson 3 – There are no Short Cuts

If lesson one was about being aware of who you are, then it needs to be appreciated that this is the hardest (but most important) thing to change – hence why people choose to just keep setting goals (or giving up on setting them all together), and keep falling short of success. Or just as justifiable, being OK with their beige mediocre lives, We only achieve outcomes that are a reflection of our own limitations. … Continue reading

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Lesson 2- Goals don’t work (yet)

Goals fail, not because they are not good goals or that they weren’t created using a tried and true system (SMART for example), they fail predominantly due to how we see, feel and perceive ourselves. This may be in the mirror, in our minds or in e-motions. Do you think Tiger Woods is failing in the golf world right now because he hasn’t set great goals or is it because his perception of self is … Continue reading

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Lesson 1 – It’s all about YOU!

If you want to change, no book, no DVD, no coach, no nothing is going to work, unless you make YOU the highest priority (at least during the time you are focused on the change). This is essential, as the energy required to change can be immense. Many see this as selfishness, but I say it is selfish NOT to make you #1 for a little while. Ask yourself, are all the people I am … Continue reading

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What Works and What Doesn’t (ever)

After 12 years, over 4,000 hours of one-on-one coaching, presenting to thousands of people in groups, facilitating change in corporations and businesses, I am just now beginning to truly appreciate what really works, and what doesn’t in empowering others to change and transform. My classroom (and coaching room) of life tells me this – most people will never change much because they don’t really want to. I know this sounds slightly negative and controversial, but … Continue reading

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